short-lived fame and some lofty thoughts on life
Well, we didn’t make the headlines after all. The Dispatch featured a few other handy-dandy recyclers but not us….probably my recycling ego was getting a bit out of control, anyway. As long as I am the Walking Queen, I don’t really care…..:)
Today was simply a beautiful day. Zia and I went for a long walk in the sunshine. My walks are slower now that she’s older; there are so many interesting things you miss until you see them through a 16-month-old’s eyes. We stopped to watch a moving lump of leaves for a long time – never did find out what was under there, but it was fascinating to watch that something moving so quickly and purposefully. 2 squirrels entertained us by dancing and chasing in a lovely spiral up and down a big tree trunk – they made Zia laugh out loud! And airplanes, and lawnmowers and leaf-blowers, and of course dogs, dogs, and dogs – how captivating such things are when they’re still new and fresh! Until we get old and used to them, and then we scarcely notice what makes up the world we inhabit. We sacrifice it for the world in our head – the next place we need to go, the next thing to do, to buy, the goal, the plan, the time schedule we have to keep, the next meal, the next meeting, the next holiday, the next duty, the next desire.
Where is real life in the midst of doing all those “necessary” but oddly fake things? I don’t want to become so caught up in life that I forget to live. I want to feel what it feels like to be alive, because life is gone all too soon. I want to notice the air I breathe, to be awake to all of creation around me; to hear the song that’s rising from the earth like a symphony, because there is a song, though we are mostly deaf to it by now. I want to remember that I, too am created….and that I have a Creator.
Lofty thoughts? Maybe not. Maybe just a good dose of reality that I need to hear more than anyone. My life consists of the the nurture and routine of a tender little girl’s life: Nurse, potty, play, nurse, potty, play…nap. Nurse, potty, play, nurse, potty, play…bath. Nurse, potty, play, nurse, potty, play…ni-night Zia. Sometimes I forget to live beyond the routine. I just try to finish one thing to get to the next, until finally the day is over and I have a few minutes to blog before crawling into bed.
I just want to truly see, to truly hear, smell, taste, feel. To not forget to take in my baby’s smile when I feed her, to exult in her fiery spirit when she bucks against me, to get down and play with her when she leasts expects it and to revel in her elation. To never get used to the awesome man I married, but every day to still see him fresh and clear for who he is, like I did that first incredible summer. To find that before work this morning (again) he carefully folded into thirds and lined with fleece a clean load of diapers for Zia…and to find that after almost 4 years he still melts me inside.
Maybe life isn’t made of the things we often think are so important.
Hi Honey………………u make my heart jump! 🙂 luv u/MOM